This May Be the Greatest Paragraph Ever Written

Don't ask me why, but earlier today I heard that wombat poop comes out cubic.  As in: wombats poop little cubes.

I doubted, and so went to the internet, and found: 

Wombats leave distinctive cubic feces. As wombats arrange these feces to mark territories and attract mates, it is believed that the cubic shape makes them more stackable and less likely to roll, which gives this shape a biological advantage. The method by which the wombat produces them is not well understood, but it is believed that the wombat intestine stretches preferentially at the walls, with two flexible and two stiff areas around its intestines. The adult wombat produces between 80 and 100, 2 cm (0.8 in) pieces of feces in a single night, and four to eight pieces each bowel movement. In 2019 the production of cube-shaped wombat feces was the subject of the Ig Nobel Prize for Physics, won by Patricia Yang and David Hu.

This warrants a closer look.

As wombats arrange these feces to mark territories...

It occurs to me that these are, basically, ready-made poop bricks, and so could be used to build a little house.  That's kinda how humans mark their territories, right?  

...and attract mates...

Yeah, that's weird, but seeing as how dogs get right up and personal to sniff other dogs' butts, despite having dog-like senses of smell, I figure animals just see these things differently.

...it is believed that the cubic shape makes them more stackable and less likely to roll, which gives this shape a biological advantage.

Why would that be a biological advantage?  Unless you're stacking them into walls to keep predators out... I mean, rabbit poop is round, and that just stays where they leave it.

The method by which the wombat produces [cube-shaped poop] is not well understood...

Science has failed us.

The adult wombat produces between 80 and 100, 2 cm (0.8 in) pieces of feces in a single night...

That's 200 cubic meters of poop every two months-ish.  Somebody check my math.  How have wombats not built their own cities by now? 

In 2019 the production of cube-shaped wombat feces was the subject of the Ig Nobel Prize for Physics, won by Patricia Yang and David Hu.

My first thought was: how do you suppose they answer the question "what was your Nobel Prize for?"  You gotta go straight-faced, right?  "Wombat poop."  Full stop.  Sip your drink without breaking eye contact.

But then I clicked through.  The "Ig Nobel Prize" is satirical in nature (a pun on the word "ignoble").  Kind of a good-humored joke which, nevertheless, seems to be taken at least a little seriously, and which includes a full-fledged award ceremony which sounds like a lot of fun and to which I should really be invited.